Hello again, Sinners:

The easiest way for the GOP field to score points in the latest “battle for America’s soul” is to attack President Obama for his alleged war on religious freedom, namely requiring that religious hospitals and universities require health providers to offer birth control at no cost to all women. The religious right, and Catholics in particular, are pissed that they will actually have to fund something that goes against their beliefs, joining the ranks of disenfranchised Americans pissed off at the government for things they also never wanted to fund, like pre-emptive wars, tax cuts for people who don’t need them, bank bailouts, drug wars, and education reform crafted by C-minus students. Forcing religious organizations to carry health care designed to keep women in control of their own lives is akin to storming the Vatican with Seal Team 6, if Newt and the frothy gentleman from Pennsylvania are to be believed.

It’s funny how the religious in this country, people who openly admit to living by “faith,” are so insecure about their beliefs that they think that the mere offer of birth control will destroy their institutions. “My god, do you mean that people might actually sleep with someone they aren’t married to?!? Why, that’s never, ever, happened before!” Apparently, the temptation to fornicate with unrestricted access to baby-stopping devices trumps all fears of eternal punishment and public shame that have been instilled in women by these organizations since birth, which is not the strongest endorsement ever for living by faith alone.

If religious freedoms were actually being attacked in this country, it would be one thing; there are plenty of places in the world where people risk their freedom to practice their beliefs as they choose. But America is not that place. Close to 80% of Americans openly proclaim to be Christians, and there are Jews, Buddhists, Muslims, Hindus, and assorted other groups openly practicing their personal brand of spirituality in this country. Less than 20% of the country is unaffiliated, and many of them are afraid to be openly labeled as an atheist or agnostic. Religious freedom is about as great in the US as it has ever been anywhere in the history of the human race. The real problem for the religious right is that they have to play by the same rules as everyone else now, as opposed to the preferential treatment to which they have grown so accustomed. The government is calling in the loan for all the tax-sheltering they’ve done over the last 200 years; the churches, grown fat on a line of credit financed by millions of vacant-minded voters, is not happy about it, so they take to their pulpits and  campaign stumps to bitch about President Obama attacking their First Amendment rights. It is, after all, much more culturally acceptable to attack Mr. Obama for his alleged “war on religion” and “secret Muslim beliefs” than for his skin tone, which irks more Americans than would ever admit it.

This is a fight that is destined to end poorly. The recent battle over the Susan G. Komen Foundation’s defunding and reversal has highlighted just how divided this country is on the issue of women’s health, especially as it relates to religious belief. Politicians are using the issue of abortion as a platform to boost their careers and get the government involved in an area of life that should remain private. No one celebrates an abortion; it is a difficult, emotional decision and is never taken lightly. It is not something done between a hair appointment and a trip to the grocery store, as many Republican politicians seem to believe. Unfortunately, this black-and-white view of the issue taints anyone who realizes the complexity of abortion as a “baby killer.” As an odd aside, most of the people who claim to be so pro-life are also vehemently against any form of welfare, which implies that their actual concern for human life ends promptly at birth. Given the number of people who rely on social services, the rising numbers of children with autism, and the life-threatening aspects of pregnancy, one would think that at least having the option of birth control—particularly if it costs very little—is not an inhumane thing to ask.

If you believe that God made us with free will and that He tests our faith with temptations, you should look at the government’s requirement for birth control as an opportunity for religious hospitals and organizations to test the faithful and see if they really practice what they preach. Offer it, and if no one takes it, then the religious can demonstrate to the rest of us the strength of their faith and convictions. The fact that these organizations are fighting so hard against it shows that the church leaders realize people might not take them as seriously as they claim. This scares the hell out of them, because it means their iron-fisted control is slipping away, and is not likely to come back.

Hymn of the Week—“Bodies” by The Sex Pistols

Nicholas B. Morris

Reverend Nick is the author of Tapewormand a fifth generation ordained minister, born and raised in southwest Arkansas. He split his childhood between small towns and farms, was educated at Arkansas Tech University and Naropa University’s Jack Kerouac School of Disembodied Poetics, and now lives in Denver, Colorado with his partner Alyssa Piccinni.